The world has a poor understanding of what being Christian actually means. Society thinks that if you are a professed Christian then you must be perfect. You must never sin or be a hypocrite. If you fall into temptation, you are no longer a Christian in their eyes. That is because they forget that the path to holiness takes a lifetime and Christianity does not come with a magic wand that blots out all sin. I wish it did (pun intended). Now the goal is to become 'perfect like our Heavenly Father is perfect', but we have to wage a serious life long battle with sin with the aid of Our Lord.
This has been on my mind because I have come head to head with some of my (many) vices this week. My two worst are coffee and Facebook. I am addicted to both. I spend too much time worrying and reading the news on Facebook, while downing a grande mocha every single day. In our society these are perfectly acceptable vices to have. In fact, they are encouraged. There have been numerous times when my husband has voiced his concerns over these items that I have made some lame excuse along the lines of "everybody is doing it". Yes, a very well thought out moral argument. However, this week my arguments fell apart as I waged a spiritual battle with coffee that I lost badly.
A couple of months ago I started boycotting Starbucks's because of their use of profits to support "gay marriage". I firmly believe that this issue will result in wide spread persecution of Christians and it is already coming to pass in various parts of the country. That being said, I ended up going to Starbuck's multiple times this week; four times to be exact. I waged a serious internal battle with myself, but the battle became less and less fierce as I gave into the sin more and more. Hence the need for regular Confession. Sin becomes easier and easier the more we do it. I am no exception. I had serious guilt as I drank my Grande White Chocolate Mocha, but I drank it anyway. Why? Because I convinced myself that it was not that bad and that all other coffee in the area isn't as good. The logic of a sinner.
What has all of this battling made me realize? That my coffee habit is in fact a deep seated sin. Anything that replaces God is unworthy of my time. I use coffee as a crutch to make it through the day. I "need" coffee. I will sacrifice my principles for coffee. As Matthew Kelly points out in his books The Rhythm of Life and Rediscover Catholicism, we pour ourselves a nice hot cup of "black drudge" instead of drink the glasses of water that our body actually needs. Coffee is a stumbling block to holiness. Why? Because if it has entered the addiction phase, as it has for most people, it is no longer a matter of temperance. Enjoying coffee for the sake of coffee is one thing, being wholly reliant upon it to get the day going is quite another. This is a reality that I have had to confront. And I don't like it. I want to be a petulant child. I want to keep up my habit, even though my habit makes me feel lousy at 3pm and I "need" (but don't drink) another cup of coffee. Many people will disagree with me here, but the path to holiness and the virtues is one of temperance, not reliance.
The same goes for Facebook. I took two days off earlier this week and I felt a lot better. I am inundated with news, most of it bad news daily on Facebook. It is like a train wreck that I cannot look away from. My husband can tell by my mood if I have been reading too many articles on Facebook. I read it throughout the day, not just for a few moments. I now realize that I have to 'cut it out' so to speak. It is not helping me on the path the sainthood. If anything, it can be a major hindrance, as I give into anger, frustration, or despair. At this point in my journey, I am not built to receive all of this information. So I am giving it up for the summer and perhaps longer. I go through this battle all of the time. My husband would rather I delete my account all together and focus on being here. He is absolutely right, but I see some good parts to Facebook. Seeing baby pictures and family updates. Unfortunately, it never stops there for me. We will see what I decide on September 1st.
The fact of the matter is that we have to examine our lives daily to see what is a stumbling block. I have identified two big ones: coffee and Facebook. My body does not need coffee, it needs water. My intellect and spirit do not need Facebook, they need prayer, Scripture, and my vocation. I have some very serious spiritual battles that I wage and Facebook and coffee make me weaker, not stronger. What are some areas that you need to think about in your life? God bless.
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