Stunned into Thanksgiving

God stunned me into thankful silence last night. We had just gotten back from our trip to Kentucky. Visiting our family is always a lot like a circus. We have 32 nieces and nephews. We saw 27 of them, plus parents, over the weekend. It gets a bit overwhelming for me about 2 hours in. Our daughter did very well with all of the commotion. She played with some of her cousins and after a bit of trepidation crawled around to people. She still is not big on her uncles picking her up, but she is getting better. Let's just say that I was pretty worn out by the time we got home last night. When I am tired, I tend to get cranky, anxious, and down. Exhaustion leaves me pretty vulnerable and I feel unarmed against doubt and fear.

The first thing that we noticed when we arrived at home is that our tomatoes desperately needed picking and that meant we needed to can. My husband was fighting off a migraine so I went out into the garden and picked the tomatoes and squash. As I was walking back in, distracted by my mind, I glanced at our Mary garden and then it hit me, it was in full bloom. I had bought a new flower to put on both sides of her back in April for my birthday. They have been slowly getting bigger and bigger with blooms here and there, but now the two flowers are big and full of blooms. They are joined by peach geraniums, pink begonias, and yellow pansies (how they have survived the heat, I do not know). I was stunned. I just stood there staring at it with a smile on my face. I thanked Our Lady and Our Lord for the grace of the beautiful garden and for the grace for me to stop and notice.

I am more and more drawn to Mary. She is not only our mother, Christ gave her to the whole world as their mother on the Cross, but she is God's mother. Her reaction to the difficulties of life is so different from my own. I usually want to rant and rave, yell in frustration, give up, escape in the pleasures of the world, or some other sinful option. I cannot even begin to comprehend watching my own child die on the cross. Yet, Our Mother, stood by and watched her Son, God, be put to death. She trusted Him completely. Regardless of her own personal suffering, she trusted everything to God. Her very few lines in Scripture all have to do with trusting God and His will. I still struggle to put this into action, especially when I look at all of the suffering in this world. I am finding, however, that the more I am thankful, the more I trust in God's goodness in my life.

Phil and I always say our prayers as we travel. We recite the Our Father, Hail Mary, Glory Be, St. Michael, Guardian Angel prayer, and ask for a safe trip from Our Lord and ask for St. Christopher's intercession. Why not ask the Communion of Saints to pray for us?! We need all of the prayers we can get day in and day out. Once we were home, it dawned on me that we never say "thank you" for a safe trip home. We are the ones who never return to say thank you and pay homage to Our Lord. I made sure to express my gratitude multiple times last night. I live a life of ingratitude. I forget to say thank you for the good and bad in my life. If I cannot even say thank you for his abundant blessings that I see as good, how can I ever make it through the hard times?

Here is some gratitude pouring into my heart:

466. Soft baby cheeks

467. Safe arrival home from KY

468. Flowers blooming around our Mary statue

469. Being stunned into grateful silence by beauty

470. Mass at St. Pat's in Maysville, KY

471. Breakfast with Phil's brother, Tony

472. The family together

473. Brothers and sisters-in-law, all 19.

474. Celebrating mom's (in-law) birthday

475. Much needed rain

476. Squash blossoms awakened by the downpour

477. Pulling ripe tomatoes from the vine

478. My husband canning tomatoes

479. Grocery trips and that I get to make them when others lack food

480. My napping daughter